Friends are important. But how do you define the word? What makes a good friend? And… according to your own definition, are you a good friend?
According to Webster, a friend is: “a person whom one knows well and is fond of, an ally, supporter, sympathizer”. This definition provides 5 essential qualities – known, fond of, ally, supporter, sympathizer. This also informs us how we are to act in order to be considered a friend by someone else. Obviously this list is far from exhaustive, but it does provide a foundation.
Actually, I’m not certain there are any universals in a list of qualities used to determine friendship. We all may hold some of the same qualities but not in the same ranking order. The issue in all this is – do we know what these are and how we recognize them? Let me give one example… One quality that I prize is the ability to be whoever I am at a moment in time but not to be confined to that – to be able to change, grow, mature and to make mistakes. This particular quality has to be one of the highest that I value.
Another person who enters our world brings their own frame of reference and this can provide us with the ability to expand our understand – as long as we are open. We don’t have to agree but we can provide one of the five Webster defined qualities – support. But this needs to be a reciprocal situation – you need to feel that your frame of reference is honored.
Friendship is a very precious gift that is given and received…. and esteemed.
Dr. Carolyn Coon
What do you think?
Socially-Speaking...
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