I firmly believe in trusting but I also firmly believe in exercising care when you do trust. In a previous discussion on trust I spent most of the time talking about you trusting others and in asking a lot of questions about how you decide whether or not to trust another person. Actually the answers to those questions form the basis for who and how you trust. They may have seemed simplistic questions but they still are foundational.
I also firmly believe that since we are not islands unto ourselves, we need to be able to trust others on some level. The other person we trust is the sounding board to our thoughts and ideas. To me, the key in this is that the other person not be judgmental and that they allow me the freedom to change.
There’s an additional quality. This may sound egotistical but I need someone who is at least as wise as I feel I need. Wisdom is a key quality. I may trust others on some level but it is the person that has ‘proved’ over time that they are wise that is my ‘go to’ person. There are not many who enter that rarefied air for me, but as long as there is one then I don’t feel I’m totally on my own.
Each person has that quality/attribute that is the most critical, the most important for their ‘go to’ person. My suggestion is that it is far worse to do the round peg in square hole. You are better waiting to discover that person than simply assigning that role to someone who doesn’t fit. You can lose a good friend if your expectations from them is not what they are able to provide.
