Doubt is a consumer. It consumes thoughts, time, energy… trust – and it rarely produces anything of value. I’m not convinced that doubt isn’t the all time worst, most crippling emotion. Once doubt rears its head, until it is resolved, it lives on the border of mind and heart – never completely vanquished.
If you doubted in an after the fact situation and were eventually proved right you could feel the fool for having believed in the first place. If you doubted and were wrong then you might feel guilty about having succumbed to doubt. If you didn’t doubt and it was subsequently proved right, you might feel betrayed. There are all sorts of emotions, most of them conflicting, associated with doubt.
Sometimes the problem is that two things/people you do trust have opposite views and attempting to determine your personal stand can be difficult. Sometimes a simple right/wrong can be blurred leaving you in that gray quicksand of confusion. Perhaps the real issue is what you do when doubt creeps in, because it can and does creep. That’s one of the problems with doubt – it’s sneaky.
With doubt, there are all sorts of levels and issues – some serious, some fundamental, some ethical, some personal, and some totally unimportant. Obviously it is those issues that are serious, ethical, fundamental, personal that have the power to consume and hurt. And there are all the layers, levels involved. So, how do you handle doubt? Do you try and not think about it (unsuccessful) or do you face the issue and attempt to arrive at some level of decision? Avoiding only leaves you sinking in that quicksand.
