This is as much a (with) ‘whom’ question as much at it is a ‘how’ (much) question. We all control the amount of us we share, with whom, and when. There are some definite criterion we use to judge how much we share. I would venture to say that trust would be an important consideration. However, it can be argued that the major determinant of the sharing is our previous experience, defined as acceptance of what we disclosed.
How comfortable are you in sharing you? Do you enjoy doing this? Is this threatening for you? How do you share you, what’s the context? Or is your sharing simply natural to whatever the situation you are in? For many people, sharing who they are is extremely difficult. Difficult can also be defined as dangerous (to self). And for shy people, sharing can be terrifying: what do I say? how do I say ‘it’? what if I say too much? what if I don’t communicate? Those thoughts can incapacitate one from saying anything.
Where is your level of comfort? Do you enjoy sharing you with others? Do you see your behavior as ‘transparent’ and thus encouraging for others? Or are you self obsessed and thoroughly enjoy regaling others of your accomplishments? What is it of you, you share? In case this sounds harsh the intent is to make you look at the content of your sharing.
As an example… I’m a listener. What I do is share questions. At a young age I discovered that most people really did like to talk, especially about themselves but they didn’t always know how to do this. As a result, and since I’m an inveterate people watcher, I began asking other people questions but I also listened to what they said. Since the subsequent questions often relied on what was just said, people began seeing that I was interested in them and what they thought and not just idly filling up the silence. This freed them to share what they wanted but in a context that let them know they were heard.
