I sometimes wonder if we realize just how many voices we have. Voices, in this context, refers to the myriad of expressions we use to ‘voice’ who we are and what we think and believe. There is the audible one, but even this isn’t a singular expression because it includes, among others, facial expression, body – especially hand language, intonation, nuances, eye contact, and the list continues. Then there is the written voice, and that too has many manifestations including the words you choose, whether or not you provide your definitions, the punctuation you use and where, how you write what you say, the care you take to help the reader understand what you are saying… and why.
Then there is the behavior, the actions you make that enhances, refutes, supports, etc. the other voices. I could go on, but I think my point is made. We all have many voices and multiple ways of expressing and presenting our voice. I think this is why the app ‘Audible’ is as popular as it is because it not only gives the words that we would see in written form, but it expresses all the other attributes that the author is conveying. We all need to be mindful that it is what we say and how we say whatever we are attempting to communicate.
That last word, communicate, is really the point. In our writing and speaking, do we check to see if what we said is what was heard? And if what was heard was heard according to our definitions? We’ve all seen evidences that people can be saying the same thing but using different words, implying different definitions because the behavior is not demonstrating a common ground. The opposite can also occur – assuming based on the presumptive common definitions and understanding of the same words. This can cause great confusion until clarity is attained. Use questions to discover commonality.
Communication is always two-way: the speaker’s intent and the listener’s understanding. As we carry on our conversations with others, it is important (presupposing we want understanding and a common definitions) that we check to make certain we really are on the same page. If your goal isn’t communication… then what is it? Do you just like to hear the sound of your own voice? OK, harsh but what is your goal? This is an intentional mindset not a stressful one. And all of this is predicated on the many voices you use to create understanding. Being on the same page insures understanding, even if it doesn’t insure agreement.
