Yes I know I’ve talked about trust a number of times and in a number of different settings. The aspect I’d like to look at this time is… HOW do you know you can trust (fill in the blank). I’m not focusing on ‘things’ but on people. How do you know you can trust him/her? Is there such a thing as instant trust? What advantages do you experience when you do trust, or don’t, or have your trust breached? How do you handle broken trust?
Trust can be a tenuous ‘feeling’ or extended status. And I suspect there isn’t one person who hasn’t experienced broken trust. Once trust is broken it’s difficult to trust that person ever again. Equally difficult is just trusting in general. Once burned it’s difficult to venture into situations requiring any form of trust. It’s the mindset of, ‘…once fooled, shame on you, twice, shame on me’ thinking. No one wants to be hurt.
Obviously, interactions and observations of the other person and your relationship with them requires time. It also requires involvement – you can’t trust from a distance… preferably involvement in a variety of situations. But perhaps the question is: why would you trust the other person? And, … why wouldn’t you? Do you know what it is you are seeking from the other person that you extend or withhold trust?
The same questions can be reversed… are you trustworthy? Do others trust you and how do you know? And if they don’t act like they trust you – do you know why? Is it justified? Are you a gossip and spread whatever the other person tells you whether or not they ask you to not say anything? I have always felt that trust was a two-way situation. If you aren’t trustworthy, why would others trust you? And if you are, don’t you see those who do trust you are also the people you trust? If this isn’t occurring – then what is really the status of the relationship?
