President, Pope, CEO” etc. was a phrase heard often when i was growing up. It meant that you were being bossy or rudely overbearing. The purpose was a wake up call to the ‘offender’ to take stock of what they were saying, and how, because no one was going to do/say/act on what was wanted. That phrase has definitely gone out of style, but it is being replaced by other comments or actions – many times very rude. Do we see these ‘warnings’ as an insult, a slur on what we are suggesting, a denial or rejection of us? Probably. But is it justified? Were we being officious?
Most of the time we do have warnings, checks that are designed to cause us to pause and consciously determine if what we are doing/saying is what we want to communicate. Perhaps the message is appropriate but the messenger isn’t. The old phrase, ‘don’t kill the messenger’, could be apt because it really isn’t what’s being said as much as how it is being said, and sometimes the ‘presenter’. If we believe the message is important, then it is important that it be presented in such a way that others can understand, accept, and ‘own’ (fill in the blank).
Message. Messenger. Method. Those 3 m’s do impact on communication. If they aren’t in sync then the communication can become garbled or mix messages… but definitely, confused. What’s your purpose, what do you want from what is said? Until you can answer those questions you won’t succeed. Remember what scripture says about words… and our tongue. (James 3:6). BUT we also have scriptures that help us with our communication:
“Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue
from evil and their lips from deceitful speech.” (1Peter 3:10)
“Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt,
so that you many know how to answer everyone.” (Colossians 4:6)
“What goes into someone’s mouth does not defile them, but what
comes out of their mouth, that is what defiles them.” (Matthew 15:11)
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be
quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” (James 1:19)
These are only a few of the scriptures, but you can readily see that we DO have aids in getting the message across clear and accurately. None of these scriptures tell us to lie, to deny truth, to misrepresent, etc. This is the standard against which we can determine: the message, the messenger, the method.
