We do show partiality. We may not want to, but… we do. No one is exempted – regardless of whether or not we want to believe and/or act partial – we do. Sometimes it’s not done on a conscious level, but it is done. The fascinating part in this is that the ‘categories’ we esteem are rarely those determined on a conscious level by ourselves, it’s been handed down (from whom?) through the ages. Typically there is a subtle granting of esteem to someone or withholding it from someone else based on their attaining a level of ‘competence’ in one of those categories. Why? Why do we do this? What benefit do we gain from this behavior?
Though we may not share all the same categories, we still do share some of them. Examples: fame, wealth, prestige (which is usually based on one of the first two listed), others’ opinions of the person. Perhaps it’s a more esoteric category such as education or career. Regardless… we do show partiality. We grant them more influence and attention. And this is displayed in our behavior from fawning to accepting their opinion. It’s also interesting that we can see this behavior in others but rarely in ourselves.
Esteem that you grant to someone else that is based on your experience with them is an entirely different situation. When it is a personal involvement then the foundation for your esteem is totally different than some arbitrary, external determination. Their ‘earning’ your trust is one of the top categories and this one alone trumps all of the other areas of determination. If the person isn’t trusted then you may listen to what they say but you take it with a grain of salt.
Partiality appears to be a given but it doesn’t need to govern. How we respond to those we are partial TO and those we are partial NOT TO goes a long way in determining who we are. It IS another character issue. If we allow ourselves to really consider what the ‘not to’ person is saying we control our partiality. But we also need to do the same to the ‘to’ people. It is the spirit in you that should determine the validity of what’s said. Blindness in either case can cause us to fall… flat.
… givens and governs
