Actually I should have made the title all caps and then put a dozen or so exclamation marks after the word. We really are an independent/I can do it! creation. It sometimes seems that the younger we are the more we are prone to this behavior – actually age has little to do with it. And it’s true – many times we can do it by ourselves. But simply because we can – is this the best approach?
I’m not convinced that everything we do needs to be done alone. Typically this simply means that we want to do what we want to do, how we want to do it, when we want to do it. Independent is defined as ‘my way’. Again, not necessarily a negative but it can become one especially if we believe we have to be the expert in everything. Not really logical. Then again, logical and independent are not necessarily bedfellows.
There are a couple of reasons I believe that at least one other person may be an important ‘partner’. One: no one can see all the options and ramifications from acting in a particular way. A second set of eyes might provide critical information. Two: both God and the Lord operated from a ‘joint’ approach – when God gave Adam a ‘helpmate’, when the ark was populated by two of each species, when Jesus sent his disciples out two by two – all examples of two being a better approach than just one.
Working with another person to accomplish a goal does not necessarily impact on one’s independence/dependence continuum. However, if we get into a ‘who’s in charge’ then we do run the risk of creating friction. If we are more concerned with who gets the credit (or who doesn’t get the blame) then we set up a dilemma, a conflict. The bottom line seems to be: what’s most important – independence or cooperation, sharing the responsibility and credit or accepting the total responsibility.
