Death ….. loss or homegoing celebration?

Death is difficult to deal with. Perhaps it’s the finality that makes it difficult or the sense of loss, the pain of separation. There also always seems to be the accompanying emotion of guilt. Regardless of what you have or have not done for the person who died you always feel you haven’t done enough.

And the emotions that accompany death….. your feelings are the key. At some point our focus shifts from the deceased person to ourselves. WE feel robbed, threatened, guilty, wishing we could have one last moment to say something or do something with/for that person. But at this moment the focus is us, not the other person.

Typically one of two emotions prevail. Either we become stoic or we are heartbroken to the point of sobbing uncontrollably. I tend of be the stoic type but breakdown later when I’m by myself. Not sure why I take this approach but I do. There’s no good, better, best approach – but it is helpful when we know what it is that we do.

As painful as funerals can be, for the Christian they should be a time of celebration. The loved one has gone home to be with the Lord and the other friends and family who have chosen to make Jesus Lord.

Homegoing should be joyful, thus the funeral ‘service’ should be joyful – however they rarely are. We should be celebrating the person’s life and the fact that they did choose to make Jesus Lord. We should be happy knowing we will see that person again. Intellectually – I suspect we do. Emotionally… maybe not. Then again… funerals really are for those left behind, not the person going home.

Dr. Carolyn Coon

Dr. Carolyn Coon

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