Have you ever thought about how much excess baggage you carry around when you don’t forgive? And that includes forgiving yourself! But we’ll talk about self-forgiveness at another time. We’re talking here about forgiving others.
Think about it… first you have to remember why it is you haven’t forgiven, next you have to know how this affects how you interact, or don’t, with the person. You also need to know how you interacted the last time so you are consistent. Knowing what initiated this unforgiveness is also important so that you aren’t affected by the same thing in the future, plus it is most annoying to forget why you are angry. It might be good to do something/say something to the unforgiven so they know you are upset with them. And the list can go on.
It’s this beginning act – forgiving – that’s important. You need to release yourself from that burden and move on. And yes, I know it isn’t easy. But it is a most freeing, liberating feeling when you do. Realize that I’m not suggesting you set yourself up to take another hit. Being aware is critical in the forgiving action.
My point is… that’s a whole lot of energy wasted in a futile act – unforgiveness. Most of the time the person you are angry with has moved on and doesn’t even recall or maybe even know you are angry. If you respond with: “… you will never forget”. Two things: 1- you may and 2- I never said anything about forgetting. Forgetting is an entiredly different issue.
