“A spoonful of sugar” may make the medicine go down but sugar coating does nothing to disguise anything. I’ve discovered that I do not do sugar coating (which will be no surprise to my friends). I do believe I’m a good encourager and not bad at cheerleading, but sugar coating is not an attribute, if you can actually consider it as an attribute. What it ends up doing is really making a liar out of you when the truth becomes apparent. Minimally it will make you appear silly or (worse) stupid.
I remember, growing up, that one of the phrases I heard often was that if I didn’t have anything nice to say about some one/thing then I shouldn’t say anything. And… ‘nice’ was not defined as lying or skirting the truth. Unless. If you were asked then you needed to be truthful and ‘qualify’ what you said by ‘this is my opinion’. But sugar coating – never! However… if you are a sugar coater, do you know why? Is it that you don’t believe the other person is strong or brave enough to handle the truth? Are you protecting yourself from a possible negative reaction to what you say? Do you sugar coat yourself!? (This is often referred to as having a ‘blind eye’ to … fill in the blank.)
In the final analysis, what does sugar coating accomplish? Perhaps it delays the truth becoming apparent or removing you as the bearer – but what about the consequences of this act? If you are discovered as obfuscating or being disingenuous what will be your reputation now? There are heavy prices to pay for that momentary ‘escape’. And before you excuse yourself by saying that you are not lying or being disingenuous, you are merely making the truth more palatable… really!?
I do recommend you reconsider your position on sugar coating. The results of your behavior may not be immediately seen but I do think you will reap what you sowed. Remember the last time you were sugar coated by someone else… what were your feelings, regardless if you saw through them or it was discovered later? Were you angered by the deception? Irritated? Or did you vow never to ask that person again? It will impact the relationship when sugar coating is discovered… and it is always eventually seen, it always does.
