“Search me [thoroughly], O God, and know my heart; Test me and know my anxious thoughts; And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, And lead me in the everlasting way.” [Psalms 139: 23-24]
“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart Be acceptable and pleasing in Your sight, O Lord, my [firm, immovable] rock and my Redeemer.”
[Psalms 19:14]
“Lord, make me an instrument of your peace: where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy.
O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console, to be understood as to understand, to be loved as to love. For it is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen.”
[St. Francis of Assisi]
I just listened to a Pastor Morris podcast. Convicted! He was talking about the 4 stages we all go through. The final stage is the ‘Make me’ stage but it is preceded by the ‘search me’ stage. These 2 are the maturing, growing stages all growing Christians experience. And they can be a bit of an ‘ouch’ at times and a bit of a delighted surprise at other times. However, if we really truly want to become a vessel that the Master can use – unavoidable.
I tend to think in terms of ‘process’ so I see our spiritual lives and growth as an ongoing process. I typically think about this specific aspect when I’ve just realized that I have done, said something very, very un-adult of me. The old ‘one step forward, two steps back’ behavior.. It always is very disappointing. And yes, that is the state at this particular moment in time. I did. For me, I think the disappointment comes after I’ve gone to the Lord, confessed, and received my cleansing (thank heavens for 1 John 1:9). Sometimes self-forgiveness is not a easy ‘task’. Critical, just not easy. However, it should stand out as a stark reminder that we always need to treat others with a spirit of forgiveness… especially if they haven’t asked for it.
The ‘Making Process’ is what I call ‘Becoming Me’. It is a never-ending adventure of discovery… sometimes with surprises and sometimes with a bit of embarrassment – truly, it’s all good. We do need to learn from our successes as well as our ‘failures’. Both provide lessons and information and do not tell me that you don’t learn from success. We aren’t one dimensional which means we do experience both realities. Just always remember that the Lord NEVER leads us in failure. Failure typically occurs when we decide we ‘can do it’ ourselves and get out of our partnership with the Lord. That behavior is always counter productive and can stem from a desire to ‘prove’ oneself as much as it can be ego emerging. KNOW the difference.
The ‘Making Process’ I view as a loving statement by my Lord that He will help me (as much as I ‘allow’ Him) to grow into the best Me I can be. Actually, I think He’s more interested in this than I am. We become valuable and usable to Him when we ‘allow’ Him to help us become…. I somehow think it’s far more a ‘making’ on His part. Yet it is always my choice, my decision.
“And this, so that I may know Him [experientially, becoming more thoroughly acquainted with Him, understanding the remarkable wonders of His Person more completely] and [in that same way experience] the power of His resurrection [which overflows and is active in believers], and [that I may share] the fellowship of His sufferings, by being continually conformed [inwardly into His likeness even] to His death [dying as He did]; so that I may attain to the resurrection [that will raise me] from the dead. Not that I have already obtained it [this goal of being Christlike] or have already been made perfect, but I actively press on so that I may take hold of that [perfection] for which Christ Jesus took hold of me and made me His own. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider that I have made it my own yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the [heavenly] prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”
[Philippians 3: 10-14]
Unless we’re standing still (which is really defined as going backwards) we are always moving in some direction. When our direction is toward the goal of the upward call then it’s an enhancing, an empowering direction. The last sentence is the point.
